IT’S NOT A SPORT!!!

Ouch! My feet and back hurts from that small shopping excursion I got to this morning. And aside from the fact that it is christmas tomorrow and there are sOoOoOoOoOo many people inside the mall AND I am using my money (hahah normally I use my parents' that was given to me), I never thought looking for things to buy is such a pain in the behind. 

 I wanted to give my friends something for christmas and well, I had no choice but to buy some shirts really because of the fact that its so hard to push and stuck yourself inside a crowd of shopping people. I also had to buy gifts for my brother, my brother-in-law and my nephew. Whew!

 And the hardest part was they were all male…and people know how hard it is to get gifts for the male…

But away from the topic, I saw a bunch of cute stuff toys on my way around the mall and I remembered something…and someone…and the thought that I have not said anything yet. Shucks…is it the fact that her new sched is not the same as mine or is it the coward gay person inside me that stops me everytime…

But enough about that. Maybe I'll buy one later…

I just hope not too later…

It will be christmas tomorrow. I think I will be a santa for now…hehehe

Then I'll be evil again later…hehehe more… 

cOnFiRmEd.,.,.

Okay…Only this time have I confirmed (and tested) the reality…and the theories that i apply for my life.

1. 11th hour syndrome - Its like 10 mins before you can log out, you'll receive a call that will last for one hour and a half >.<

2. my "neither" theory - okay…I accept…I really sound like a gurl over the phone >.<

3. Coffee - its like the first two days I drank coffee and I accept calls right after I log in. Well, that coffee is cursed!

4. Kashing - paydays are really both good and bad…Good for they give me money…bad for I lose them right away T_T

5. Play over Work - if only I can do them at the same time. but unluckily, I cant

6. Some good times never seem to happen

7. I REALLY DIDN'T KNOW THAT WE ARE NOT ALLOWED TO EAT ON THE FLOOR!!!

8. I hate cameras…unless Im the one handling them.

9. Sleep, like hunger, can pass.

10. weekend=lots of playtime unless….

11. I must think of another one… 

Mask

Eyes ever seeing, blind yet seeking
Ive never seen the light in front of me
Static and White, I will never be
The one I ought to be

Black butterflies in the spotlight
I could never reach it
It's so beautiful yet
I could never catch it's breathe

Do you need to?

The mirror looks back
And it seems to know you better
You could not recognize who it is
But it mocks you…

…just by looking

You get out of the cold shade of darkness
But with something to cover you
Something to hide the reality
That no one should see

and no one will…

Im standing here shocked and still
With nothing more to say
Hiding and still faceless
behind a thousand masks

Kung mamalasin k nga naman…

Its not that I hate these days, its just that its so ironic that something would be gone when you really need it. Shucks… all I need is sonething to keep me awake for 9 hrs in the graveyard shift and POOF my spill proof mug broke (or rather it became cocokrunch >.<). And I need some cash to buy a gift for my sister's husband but DAMMIT no banks and tellers are open! They're suppose to be 24hrs but now I lack money. Good thing I have no work tomorrow, coz if there is, I would not have fare as well.

 And, sorry bout this, I've heard of another person's happiness and for some grotesque reason, (grotesque<–maybe too brutal) it just made me jealous. Maybe it's just the B.I. in me that still doesn't resolve. Or maybe its just the fact that I've been trying (and miserably failing) that very same thing and I cant seem to get it right. Why can't I get it right? maybe because there are conflicting postulates in my mind…one is right and the other would defy. I dont know what to do anymore…

 Then this topic yesterday had to crop up and I heard a message (coming from 'someone') that kinda points at me…well, not really directly but, you know, it goes there. They really don't know coz I dont actually tell them. Hahaha… but it somehow stopped something from me… Well, I guess they will know that when the right time comes…

Kung mamalasin k nga naman…minsan alam mong mali na pero iniisip at ginagawa m parin. kahit minsan yun ang makakasira sa tingin sa iyo ng ibang tau e kailangan mo pa ring sundin…nakatago pero sinusunod pa rin… dahil lang iyon ang pagkatao m…iyun ang tunay na ikaw. Alam mong hindi ka nila matatangap sa ganun pero wala ka nang magagawa. Magpaliwanag? siguro. bahala na cla kung anong iisipin nila. lumayo sila kung gusto nila…desisyon nila yun…magalit sila kung magalit…d ko cla mapipigilan. Pero sana hindi nmn nila ko husgahan. Ako to. natangap ko na to mula pa noong araw na iyun na nakompirma ko ang lahat…hahaha…

Hindi ko na ikukento ang lahat. D pa panahon. D pa dapat. Magsasaya muna ako hanggat kasama ko ang mga tao sa paligid ko. Hanggat hindi pa nila kilala ang nasa harap nila…hanggat kaya ko pang magtago. Sa tamang panahon, desisyon na nila kung kasamahin pa ako o hindi. Kung matangap nila ako…tama ako. Kung nde, bahala na.

tae. ilang buwan na lang twenteen na ako pero kumusta naman ang buhay…hindi ko pa alam ang pwedeng mangyari.

Nasaan k n b kasi? Hindi ko alam kung cno ka at kung nandito ka na pero gusto ko nang makilala ka. Sana lang hindi ka tulad ni Juan…puro ego at walang utak. Puro conventional, walang realistic. Puro…ideal…

Kung mamalasin ka nga naman…

Everyday from now on

Thank You for choosing our Internet services. My name is Vic.

Yeah…I can see that…

According to our automated system, I see that the number 8356013409 is the number associated with your  High speed Internet account, is this correct?

What ever you say.

And you are calling because of a connection issue, is this right?

Nope. I'm calling because of a damn freaking customer trying to say how good he is and how low my education is with regarding his connection. Dammit!! Is he that good? he does'nt even know how to powercycle and stuff…and his cursing his wrecked, obnoxious words at me. if he is so techie, then why is he calling for MY assistance?!

Oh…I see. i'll just ask you a few questions to clarify your problem.

Like what? Why type og mind I am using? What type of &%**&^ some people are?

/*Silence*/

Sorry Sir, I was thinking of a way to solve your problem. I'm accessing a tool to test the line between you and our server.

Okay. And by that you need me to solve this guy? OKay, considering not all people are like this, I can let this pass for now. I hope I can cope with this and the shock I will be going through throughout this term. Shitznitchz, can I even do this? Okay, Ive been back home for almost 20yrs now, why should I quit now?

Thats great sir! Is there anything more I can help you with?

No. Just help yourself. You can do this. We can do this, even if its the last thing we do, right?

Right.

/*Baiting script*/

Again, this is Vic. Thank you for choosing our internet services. We value your business. Have a great day.

With all the waiting calls, I hope I can.